Tuesday, 24 May 2011

long time no blog ey?!

heeeeeeeeeeylo! I haven't blogged in abolsutely ages just cause ive actually managed to make a life for myself. Last time I blogged I was with my boyfriend of 10 and a bit months and then he moved school and its all been a bit topsyturvy since then.. but im now happy as can be with my new boyfriend Joshua. Oh god this sounds like a proper teenage blog like omg i absolutely love him and all this crap.. but i do? well i'm pretty sure i do? its hard to say until ive lived a bit more of my life. I never really know what to write about.. :)

I suppose I could do a fashion blog as I do aspire to be a fashion journalist although I dont know if i'd be any good at it suppose I always yabber on about a load of crap. But if i had a proper job at a major magazine which is one of my hopes (as well as modelling) then I'd have to write about a specific subject.. But I have the crappest ideas in the world.. well I dont but they'd all be roughly about the same thing and I'd really love some random subjects submitted by people and then maybe I could research them and I know I'd have a lot of fun writing and finding out about them.

Then again I would absolutely love a blog where i could just RANT RANT RANT about the problems in my life and they'd probably seem so minor due to some of the maor issues in the world but they mean an awful lot to me:/ its really hard to decide. And for anyone reading this you must be thinking "wtf she wants to be a journalist but there is so many grammatical errors in her work" and i do sincerely apoligise about these but i'm such a lazy buggar that i really can't be arsed to go through and correct them. I know the saying : "Quality Not Quantity" but i have been dying to blog and i really just want to get it out of my system!

This is a real ramble of random things and i suppose just a catch up to my imaginary readers? I dont really want to promote cause i quite like the privacy that its REALLY unlikely that people i know are going to read this but i also like the fact that its open for people i dont know to read and perhaps share my point of view on things and empathise with me? yougetzmeh? gawd i really hate speaking fake-chav but its so in at the moment. I really hate following the crowd but sometimes this can be SO entertaining!:)

I have like a sort of OCD about originality, I hate being copied. I really do, even the littlest thing can annoy me such as I had the idea I could buy a permenant marker and write inspirational messages on the white front of my converse.. so I wrote 'be happy' on one pair and 'just smile' on the other. Well as I rolled into school today, one of my friends had her converse on and looky here she had written 'be happy'. oo i bit my tounge as i do, and held it in. Just little things like that really tick me off:/ to be honest i have come to terms with my very short temper.. although it did spring off a little earlier aswell. as my boyfriend implicitly said that he'd rather I didnt come and meet his friends with him although he wouldn't admit that he didnt want me there. well what was i to say? i know you dont want me there but im absolutely bored out of my brains and i would really love to come? urgh this has changed into a rantttttt. i apoligis deeply for my obscene behaviour.

I know most people around my age range are doing exams at the moment, regretfully this inludes me. I did a few a few weeks ago, they were maths. Considering im quite good at mtahs i did rather well in them, one qualifier off the highest you could get! And then today I had my English Reading Test which considering i was on holiday all of last week i managed pretty well on. The topic of my reading test was banana's? come on?!they always pick the most random subjects for things like that.. pfft!?

And as things go with my friends though, they are having problems. As some of them are developing quicker than others, some want to experiment with new things and others are telling them they're being silly. AAAAAHHHHHH all one big kerfuffle, I just try and be the mother of the group but not moddycoddle (ithink) them.. I let them do what they want but advise them on what is right.

I have a house party coming up in the next few weeks, and my friends have started mixing with some of the lads from my boyfriends school. Its funny because they all have their eye on one of them, and i know that when they're all out of it things are gonna come out! well me&my boyfriend will probably end up the ones that look after everyone! I always am the one that looks after everyone, whether I'm drunk or not i'm still the mother. And to be quite honest I do really enjoy that role, it gets respect&love and what more could you want?

Also as previously mentioned, I went on holiday last week. All that needs to be said on the matter was : It. Was. Awful. I could say a whole lot more about it but really you wouldn't want to hear about it!

Another thing that has twigged in my memory abotu a controversial subject that i quite liked.. our headmaster is very phsycological and he brought up an interesting point in an assembly this week. He was talking about how we're always discovering parts of ourselves that we never knew about. This really affected me as I'm always finding things out about me, like stuff that i like. And sometimes yeah i do lie to myself about things even in my head, some things that i really dont want to come to terms with. But im sure -almost positive- that in time I will develop a way to handle these things. Sometimes I reall do think that i'm growing up too fast for my own good, but that's a subject for another day ey?!

At this moment I am multitasking, at the start of this 'article' I was on the phone to my friend, and throughout it i have bee tweeting my friend Melina about a T4 competition I was hoping to enter. Although as things go it obviously wasn't meant to be that this was my oppertunity to break into the business as one of the dates that need to be totally free is the day of my prom. And thats an event I am not going to miss for the world! I have my dress, my vespa ride is sorted and i'm so looking forward to it!

This really has developed into a ramble but its made me feel a whole lot better. And typing out my problems makes me see that they aren't so bad and that i'm probably just being silly! There's a girl who I play netball with in the year below, and she's moving to Australia on Friday. I talk to her on and off, usually on the coach on the way to a match. And she is SOOOO lovely, and i really do think she'll be missed SO much! It makes me think about how she's gonna feel going up into a brand new country, a brand new climate with a whole different class of people? She's gotta be pretty damn strong to withold something like that. I really feel for her, I couldn't live without my bestfriends and my boyfriend. It sounds like a really stereotypical thing for a teenager to say and I'd agree on that because I have lost count of how many status' ive seen it on this WEEK let alone in my lifetime! But i truly mean it, my friends have got me through everything. And i hope that I've got them through some hard times in their lives, we've all been through some tackles. Some more than others but we get through them and we carry on smiling.

I was just thinking maybe i could do a post baout endorphins.. I know quite a lot about them? Which is weird for a girl of my age.. but things like that really do interest me. My boyfriend always calls me a know-it-all cause I always talk about things like this. I love even the word endorphin.. if you dont know what it is its a chemical in your brain that makes you happy. :)

well i think that should just about do for today. I feel a whole lot lighter now.. like I've got a lot off my chest even though I haven't really! Thats why I think I'd be a good journalist.. although they are supposed to inject humour into their work and i'm not a very funny person over text so maybe it wont be my fortay!

thanks for reading :):):):)):):):):)))))))))))

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